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New Book! Oh, And They Prescribe Psych Meds For Colds Now. 😈

Hey, babes!

Not sure what I want to say this week. My hope is to have a peaceful, calm brain week, to be honest. Less thinking, more doing. I finished episode three of Teddy, my very naughty shota series. I’m hoping to clean up the first two episodes, same with the first 3 of City Howls, and have another City Howls ready in a week or two. Lol, I wince just mentioning a deadline—let’s say the near future? At some point, while I’m alive, these things shall come to pass. XD

So… I kinda freaked the fuck out

Oh, I know what to talk about! I had a freak out this week. A full blown, WTF, did I wake up in the real world, crazy anger moment. Whoo. I didn’t even know I still had it in me. I didn’t even know I could still be triggered, but fuck, I was. I might still be. @[email protected] It’s actually kinda cool to realize I can still freak out over something. It’s like finding a pattern in my brain that I get to poke at and smooth out until I find a chill state of being again. This is all mental association focused on one moment.

Okay, so I have a twin brother and he had a fever this week. He’d been sick for 2 weeks (working while sick, too, the stupid ass.) Now he was suddenly complaining of his sinuses feeling like they’re going to explode and he had bloody snot, etc, etc and a fever. I drove him to his primary care and when he came out he had a prescription for an antibiotic… and an antidepressant. A SSRI.

I flipped. Fucking flipped.

Our biological mother was bipolar. I am bipolar. Given the genetic tree, there’s a good chance he is on the bipolar spectrum. SSRIs make people with bipolar fucking crazy—I know first hand because I spent a year being fed SSRIs by mental health professionals, and I was fucking crazy. I lost a year of my life (nearly took my life) while being told these doctors were making me better (they didn’t give a fuck about my input of how none of this felt better) until one finally had the stones to say, hey, I think you’re on the bipolar spectrum and these pills are hurting you. I walked away after that. They had my medical history and it took them a year to put it together. Got off the pills and saw just how much they were making me crazy. I still had PTSD, I wasn’t a ‘stable’ being by any means, but I also wasn’t being pumped full of something that was making me insane.

I feel like I need to add something here about me not being a doctor—and I’m really fucking glad about that because doctors seem to let their textbooks do a lot of the thinking for them these days instead of looking at what’s right in front their noses. Taking yourself off of psych meds can be dangerous. It can kill you. Withdrawal isn’t fun and I don’t think there is a psych med out there that doesn’t punish you for stopping it. Going on psych meds can be just as dangerous if you’re not working with an empathetic human being who actually gives a fuck about your wellbeing. Even if they care, these drugs can harm you. Those little pills are not passive and you should be informed about every interaction you have with them. Every time.

Anyways, I was so triggered—let’s be honest, I’m still not dealing with this shit well. XD There is a lot of anger, a lot of what ifs. I’m still not sure if I’m rational about the situation. An adult walks into a doctor’s office asking for medicine because he’s afraid he had the flu and he might be hit with a secondary infection—the flu has been killing a lot of people this year. The doctor takes this time to immediately evaluate him on a mental health level and prescribe him a psych med, not bothering to see if he has a family history, or if these meds are even right for him. You’re depressed, let’s send you home with some happy pills. Ignore he can’t stop these happy pills once he starts because of withdrawal and severe chemical imbalance potentials. Ignore if you’re of a certain brain chemistry, these happy pills can make you suicidal. Don’t question his ability to make rational decisions when he’s coming in with a fever of 101 after being sick for 2 weeks. Ignore how simple daily exercise can improve mood or the stabilizing of blood sugar—and again, I love my brother but the stupid fuck is diabetic and eats like a dumbass. Blood sugar has a huge effect on mood, as does not supplementing Vitamin D3 this time of year for those not living near the equator. No, ignore all of that. No, you have a fever, let’s send you home with some happy pills.

There is a leap of logic in this situation I am not following. It’s a situation where I see someone at their most vulnerable—sick and in need of help—being given a drug that can have long term consequences on mental health and wellbeing with no proper evaluation. My bf says my reaction (the logical one, not the emotional WTF XD) is justified, but I just don’t know. I was triggered. I went into a doctor’s office over 10 years ago, explained I hadn’t seen a doctor since my mother died, my father was now dead, I was homeless, and had just gotten out of an abusive living situation. She handed me a pill that made me suicidal in under 2 weeks. Just until I could see the psych doctor. Something to hold me over. It worked for her, the prescribing doctor, and she really didn’t want me to be so upset. Well, I became more upset and ended up in a psych ward because of it.

You think that would have been enough for me but I still gave these people a year because I felt so lost, I wanted someone to fix me. It took a year to realize they couldn’t, I was the only one who gave a fuck enough to figure out this problem and solve it. It was isolating, frustrating because I couldn’t talk to a doctor like a person. Very few would see me as more than a bunch of symptoms—and some of them were angry, resentful that their choice of pill wasn’t ‘fixing’ me. I was apparently failing them. I have doctors now who I can talk to—actually, all the doctors I have are people I made sure would talk to me like an equal and the ones who wouldn’t, I discarded. I’ve had potential new doctors immediately try to take me off of things that work. I’m talking serious life-altering meds, such as thyroid and cortisol supplements that keep me alive and functioning. As an adult I was able to say fuck off and find a new doctor. But my fuck, there were still tears to realize that these people would literally choose to hurt me because I didn’t fit into their textbook. It’s my body, it’s my brain, it’s my life and I am not obligated to suffer just because a doctor wants to see what this pill will do next.

That well meaning doctor ten years ago wanted to help me and instead nearly killed me, and for all I know, she’s doing it to every person who steps into her office—an office half a state away and yet here is the same fucking behavior 10 years later with different doctors. I had serious life problems when I walked into that doctor’s office—PTSD, homelessness, death in the family, abuse—but my brother today? He’s held the same job for 4 years, pays his bills, eats consistently, has no self destructive behavior (if you ignore the sweet tooth.) His life is not reflecting a mind of chaos or pain. I think he could wait until a real psych doctor or therapist sees him before handing him a pill. Why couldn’t a doctor supposedly trained for this situation see the same thing? Or is this exactly what they’re trained for now?

Medicine is an industry in America, a system to make money. Huge money is in medicine. It’s why we’re having political battles over healthcare. It’s not about socialism or universal health care; someone wants all that money and they can’t have it if a different health care system is in place. It’s where opioids are being prescribed like candy and patients are becoming addicted. Where staff infections are growing because of antiquated ideas of hygiene. Where the flu vaccine they want to make that will actually work for every genetic mutation of the flu is just too expensive to produce, so we’ll probably never have it. Where it took them this long to admit that early screening of mammograms usually leads to false positives and a huge amount of stress for the women involved. Not to mention, where my doctors have looked more unhealthy than me, overweight, overworked, underpaid and super stressed.

Growing up, I liked to think of doctors as people who helped people—that makes sense, right? I think doctors want to help people, certainly. Now all I see are tools being used to push pharmaceuticals to an assembly line of patients who are rushed through the door. Doctors are the drones at the end of the line to hand over whatever sexy new ‘life saving’ pill that took millions to billions to develop.

I know that’s really fucking cynical, and still, that’s where my brain goes because I haven’t ever left a doctor’s office without a script in hand. My bf has a dentist who refuses to pull a bad tooth or fix it, but hey, if he needs botox, they offer that now. It’s all about the money, not about the patient. I truly feel for those who don’t feel empowered to get the help they need, those who find their health slipping and it becomes the new norm no matter what pills are handed to them.

Would I have ever gotten my health back if I were in the normal system of health care? They don’t believe in the thyroid meds I take, they don’t believe adrenals ever need help unless you have Addison’s, they don’t know how to diagnosis Lyme disease because they’re looking for antibodies the body hasn’t produced instead of the bacterium itself. Mold toxicity is automatically mental health problems because mold toxicity presents as a mental health issue and no one is asking those psych patients what the fuck they’re allergic to. We look at this big, amazing, modern world with so much knowledge and information but our systems of health care aren’t catching up. It’s like watching dinosaurs lumber around, too big, too set in their ways, unable to realize that we know more and need to innovate. We’re still trying to get racist misinformation out of medical texts because they used to experiment on blacks and said they felt less pain than the frail white women.

I want the world to be as smart and sensible as I know it can be, but that’s just not going to happen. It’s still far better in some ways than my mothers’ generation—both my biological and adoptive mother were experimented on in psych wards—but there is still so far to go. When you walk into a doctor’s office complaining of pain or cold or mental duress, just be aware of whatever substance you end up putting in your body as a result. You gotta have your back cuz they’re not answering to anyone. Their textbooks says you’re wrong and they’re right every time. If your life grows worse, no one is held accountable. If you die, no one cares. No one sues the doctors or the pharmaceutical companies if you shoot your brains out over the wrong psych med prescription. And I’m not saying it’s all bad, it’s all wrong, but I know more people in the other half of the small state I live in who have gotten knee and hip replacements surgery recently while no one I know in this area has. Being closer to the big hospitals with surgeons on hand might be enough to suddenly need surgery for every ailment. Again, an absolute jump in logic, but that’s where my brain goes because I’m cynical as fuck about the entire thing.

He went in for a cold and came out with an antidepressant. What is the rational jump there?

Teddy Gets A Package

Hidden in the suburbs, a prostitution ring of boys gains a new star.

Teddy didn’t expect to be trapped in the back of a truck with a horny postman today of all days. Lief’s birthday party is moments away and Teddy just knows he’s going to be late. Mr. Sullivan likes that he’s new, really likes his mouth, and has no remorse ruining Teddy’s brand new outfit. Worse, he leaves Teddy aching with no relief to be had. Teddy can only hope to get home and cleaned up before Lief’s party is over.

Fancy new clothes, parties, and a room of his own are just some of the perks of moving in with his Granny. Lief, the boy next door, ignites a blossoming love Teddy has never felt before. Life is perfect, but Teddy is learning nothing is what it seems in his new home.

Each episode in this mm shota/ageplay serial is over 10,000 words long and features encounters between older men and petite, youthful bottoms. Playful and sexy with dark undertones, don’t miss the latest erotic installment of Teddy’s Naughty Adventures!

Blank Slate – $0.99

“Glad you found time in your very busy schedule to join us.”

Colby:
I only agreed to model nude for a community art class because I needed the money. I figured it would be easy, fun even. But that was before I came sprinting into the studio on the first day, late and viciously hungover, and found myself face-to-face with Axel Hawthorne. Suddenly I was stripping down in front of the very man who had blown me off after a brutally hot night on the dance floor…and letting him draw me. Hot tempered and abrasive, I knew there was more to Axel than met the eye. As the term went on I decided I was going to figure out why an award-winning artist was teaching local art classes. And why I couldn’t get his stupid, gorgeous face out of my head.

 

Alpha’s Calling: An MM Mpreg Romance

I would do anything for my fated mate…

Freddie Hawkins was everything, but ordinary. The cocky wolf shifter was undeniably handsome, but his past was something he never wanted his omega to learn about.

He was always looking for his dream-come-true omega. More than anything, he wanted to settle down and start a family. So when he found the fated mate of his dreams, all he wanted to do was grab some alone time with him. He didn’t realize their kiss could change the fate of the entire world.

Well, sh*t.

Jonas Bishop was a wild and independent jaguar shifter, ready to start a new life. He wasn’t exactly looking for love. Instead, love found him at the worst time imaginable. After they kissed, the town of Frisky Pines disappeared in front of his eyes. It wasn’t long after that he discovered he was pregnant… with triplets?!

Pyromancer – $0.99

One desperate night, a rent boy hot enough to scorch the motel sheets, meets a man doomed to burn for love.

Christian Ryder is cursed with pyromancy, a deadly ability he has difficulty controlling. Having hurt lovers in the past, he has sworn off personal attachments.

Tanner O’Bannon is broke and desperate. The recent loss of his father has thrown Tanner into a tailspin of debt he can’t afford to pay. Working as a rent boy allows him to pay the mortgage and his college tuition, but it’s burning away his soul in the process.

Through the machinations of an escort agency these men are thrown together. Smoldering embers of desire fan the flames of love, but will it be enough to make Christian overcome his fear of love, or to save Tanner from the fire?

Last week to read for free.

Teddys Naughty Adventures 3

Teddy Gets A Package

Hidden in the suburbs, a prostitution ring of boys gains a new star.

Teddy didn’t expect to be trapped in the back of a truck with a horny postman today of all days. Lief’s birthday party is moments away and Teddy just knows he’s going to be late. Mr. Sullivan likes that he’s new, really likes his mouth, and has no remorse ruining Teddy’s brand new outfit. Worse, he leaves Teddy aching with no relief to be had. Teddy can only hope to get home and cleaned up before Lief’s party is over.

Fancy new clothes, parties, and a room of his own are just some of the perks of moving in with his Granny. Lief, the boy next door, ignites a blossoming love Teddy has never felt before. Life is perfect, but Teddy is learning nothing is what it seems in his new home.

Each episode in this mm shota/ageplay serial is over 10,000 words long and features encounters between older men and petite, youthful bottoms. Playful and sexy with dark undertones, don’t miss the latest erotic installment of Teddy’s Naughty Adventures!

13,000+ wrds, Published Feb 23, 2018.
Heat level: XXX


READ AN EXCERPT FROM CHAPTER ONE

Teddy stared down at the bed and worried his lower lip between his teeth. He dumped all the clothes Lief brought him out of the large black plastic trash bag onto the bedspread in the hopes it would make things easier, but he was still clueless. He didn’t know what to wear. Lief was coming over for his birthday party any minute now, and Teddy still couldn’t pick an outfit.

He wasn’t used to such nice clothes. They all looked so beautiful, but Teddy knew he couldn’t wear them all at once. He reached for a pair of pants and ran his palm over the smooth, shiny material. It was so grown up and sophisticated. Teddy was used to rags worn so many times they were full of holes and sweat stains before they even got into his hands. Because he was so short and slender, his clothes always billowed like an unsightly potato sack. These clothes were tight enough to fit him and hug his skin like a glove. They were fancy. Sleek. They felt as good as they looked and Teddy couldn’t help but slide his bare thighs close and press against the pile of fabric.

With a grin, Teddy gave into the overwhelming urge and jumped onto the pile of clothes. The bed bounced beneath him, and he muffled a laugh as he burrowed into the nice smelling fabric. It was too hot and the morning sun was already heating up the stuffy room, but Teddy didn’t care. This was like a million Christmases all at once. Clothes, real clothes just for him. No, this was a billion Christmases because today was Lief’s birthday and he was going to come over and play. Granny Emma even let Teddy pick out a birthday gift for him.

Teddy turned his flushed face and gasped a breath in. A smile stretched his lips and his blue eyes dazzled beneath the dark ringlets stuck up in a halo around his head. He really hoped Lief would be his friend. Maybe more than friends. He wanted a real kiss from Lief, not just a peck on the cheek. Just thinking about Lief pressing his lips to his the same way Mr. Fowler had, tongue teasing into his mouth, had Teddy’s sweat-sheened body burning and boyish length stiffening. He groaned and wiggled his hips to try and get some relief from the sudden pressure of his swelling dick. Teddy’s hole throbbed, and he whimpered and buried his face into the clothes.

Oh, all it was doing was throbbing now, aching and demanding all his attention at the worst of times. Teddy didn’t know what to do about it. His morning cleaning with the thick enema spout only made it worse. He hoped that having all that soothing fluid wash into him would stop the ache, but it only made his swollen pucker extra sore until every beat of his heart made his hole twitch and ache.

“I don’t wanna be late,” Teddy mumbled as he rocked his hips to get friction on his dick. Oh, it ached so much. Teddy reached behind him, pushed fingers between his cheeks and spread himself open as he searched for his entrance. “Oh, that’s good,” he whispered. His pucker stretched for his slim fingers and he gently probed the sore flesh. It was really good, nearly a relief to the throbbing, and he sighed and rested his head on the bed while lazily playing with his hole.

Mr. Fowler might be really big. Too big. Teddy never had anything so big inside him. He wasn’t even sure if his hole was really, well, meant for that. Mr. Fowler didn’t seem to think he was a girl, not when he was teaching him all those grownup men things they shared. When he put that dildo in him, and after… when he put his big dick in him… Teddy moaned and tried to get his thin fingers deeper into his passage.

Ever since his first cleaning with Dr. Wilson, Teddy’s body just didn’t want to behave. It wasn’t just his sensitive skin and tingling nipples. His dick kept getting hard at all the wrong times and his hole—oh, it was turning into a burning, aching agony that only found any relief when he touched it. All yesterday while helping Granny Emma bake the cake and clean the big downstairs house, Teddy kept having to hide away and push fingers inside just to stop the ache.

Teddy wasn’t sure it was normal. He wanted to see if Mr. Fowler would come by soon, maybe tomorrow, and help him fix it because he just couldn’t do it on his own. His fingers were too short and he needed something to touch that spot inside of him so everything felt better. Just, he didn’t know how to get to Mr. Fowler. Dave came by appointment for the yard work and that was it.

Teddy panted softly into the clothes as he removed trembling fingers and waited for his dick to soften. He needed longer fingers and it just wasn’t fair. He was going to go crazy like this.

Teddy pushed up on his arms, and his curls hid his flushed face as he stared at the pile of clothes. He licked his lips and tried to push down the overwhelming heat moving through his body. He was like this all yesterday and it was miserable, painful. Huffing in frustration, Teddy grabbed the closest pair of shorts and quickly wiggled into them and carefully zipped them up. They were tight, and he had to take a few deep breaths to keep from getting hard again.

He wanted to see Lief. It was his birthday and he was going to see his new friend, and yeah, that was it. No thinking about kisses or anything like that. Nothing that got him hard. He just needed to think of the really cool gift he got Lief.

Oh, he hoped Lief liked it!

His enthusiasm and smile was back as Teddy sorted through the shirts and settled on a sleek, purple top with black short sleeves. It was silky smooth like water. He pulled it over his head and Teddy giggled when he stretched it down. It was like warm ice, all sleek and slippery. Teddy scooped up an armful of clothes and walked them over to the bureau and shoved them into the top drawer. He’d fold them after Lief’s party. Worried Lief might already be at the door, Teddy whirled and grabbed the rest of the clothes from the bed and quickly stuffed them into the second and third drawers.

Teddy paused and peered into the dusty mirror atop the bureau. He looked completely different, nearly someone worth looking at. Teddy ran his fingers into his messy hair and brought some order to his black mop of curls. They were Lief’s old clothes and Teddy really hoped he wouldn’t be disappointed to see him in them. Teddy never owned anything so fine. He never owned anything at all, really.

Teddy rubbed his palm down the front of his shorts where his erection was trying to swell, and he whimpered from the sensation. The tight clothes were making him too aware of his body, making him hot and dizzy. He kinda liked it though, and how it all clung to him. Teddy was hyper aware of the pinch around his thighs and the way the shorts dug into his crack and made his hole throb. The shirt was tight and it tugged at his nipples with every movement. He’d probably like everything about it if he could just cum already. Oh, but he really needed to cum…

“Teddy!”

Teddy’s blue eyes widened in the mirror at the sound of his grandmother’s voice echoing through the large house. “Lief’s here!” he cheered.

He smiled brightly as he booked it to his bedroom door and ran down the hall to the stairs. The downstairs door was void of visitors, and Teddy quickly turned to the living room further down the hallway. His eyes flashed around to make sure nothing looked too messy. He was proud of all the work he’d done on the downstairs rooms. It wasn’t as clean as he’d like; there were still stacks of magazines that needed to be sorted, and the undesirables tossed out with all the newspapers he dragged to the curb yesterday. Teddy had pushed them up against a wall and tried to make it look as inconspicuous as possible. Things were really dusty, but for the most part everything was much cleaner than how it started. You could even see the old tube television now without all the piles of newspapers.

Teddy found Granny Emma in the kitchen putting the finishing touches on the cake. “Granny, is Lief here?” His shoulders slumped when his grandmother shook her head.

Emma peered through her thick glasses at the top of the cake where she was making pretty flowers with a tube of frosting. She was wearing a flower-print dress today. It was the most color Teddy had seen her in since she broke her leg and he was sent to live with her. When Teddy stepped up close to see how the decorating was coming, she placed the tube of frosting down and fixed him with a stern look. “Teddy, the postman should be stopping by soon. I want you to go outside on the curb and wait for him.”

“Huh? But Lief’s party is starting soon!” Teddy exclaimed with a pout.

“Yes, and you’ll have plenty of time to play once you’re done. Mr. Sullivan is going to need the help of a strong young man.”

“Okay, Granny,” Teddy agreed with a frustrated sigh. He didn’t dare complain. The last thing he wanted was to upset Granny and end up missing the party completely, or have her decide she really didn’t need his help around the house. “Will you make sure Lief doesn’t leave until I get back?”

“Lief is planning on being here all day,” Granny reminded calmly as she reached for her pipe and puffed a cloud of vanilla scented tobacco with a content hum. Teddy had uncovered Emma’s deceased husband’s pipe when cleaning through all the trash in the living room, and the house was full of the nice scent since. It really was the most peaceful household Teddy had ever lived in. He had a full breakfast without needing to fight or be told he was a waste to feed. He woke up in a bed and room all just for him. And now he had clothes, and a grandmother who made birthday cakes, and even a friend all of his own.

No, he wasn’t about to complain about anything. Everything was perfect.

“I’ll go out right now!” Teddy cheered and headed for the kitchen door.

“Good boy. Remember to do everything you’re told.” Emma took another long drag on her spindly pipe and picked up the tube of frosting to finish the cake decorations.

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The Library

THE LIBRARY

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PARANORMAL AND CONTEMPORARY MM EROTIC ROMANCES BY BESTSELLING AUTHOR SADIE SINS

THE PARANORMAL ACADEMY FOR TROUBLED BOYS

NEW ADULT PARANORMAL MM ACTION ADVENTURE AND ROMANCE WITH SHIFTERS, SORCERERS AND GANGSTERS

HELLCAT

ADULT PARANORMAL MM EROTIC ROMANCE WITH SHAPERSHIFTER, NERD TURNED SEX THRALL, AND UNWITTING BFF

DEMON BONDED

NEW ADULT PARANORMAL MM EROTIC SERIAL FOCUSED ON DEMONS, SORCERY, AND POWER STRUGGLES

AWAKENING

NEW ADULT PARANORMAL MM EPIC FANTASY ROMANCE WITH FAE, GODS, AND ANGST

CATALOGUE OF MM BOOKS BY SADIE SINS

All published, including bundled completed serials

Demon Arms
The Paranormal Academy For Troubled Boys: Book 1

Just dodging jail, dragon shifter Wylie ends up in the Academy, an institution for out of control paranormals. He falls for a sexy, troubled sorcerer whose magical infliction makes him too deadly to touch. Convincing Dorian to be his might just get them all killed.
X 101,000+ wrds, paranormal, dragon shifter, sorcery, first time, NA. Published: April 1, 2016

Demencious Saga
Demon Bonded Collection: Book 1

This volume contains episodes 1-4 of Demon Bonded, as well as the bonus episode ‘Far From Home’, written by Sadie Sins and previously published 2015-2016. Demencious Saga is the first saga in the mm erotic world of Demon Bonded. This serial is a fun play on monster collecting and male harems. Expect demon bonding, master/slave relationships of mild and abusive nature, multiple partners, magical powers, learning how to be a sorcerer, and conflict with crueler demon masters.

X-XX 50,000+ wrds, serial, paranormal, humanoid demons, sorcerers, and bondage. Published: January 28, 2017

Apprentice Saga
Demon Bonded Collection: Book 2

This volume contains episodes 5-9 of Demon Bonded, as well as the bonus episode ‘The Forging Of An Apprentice,’ written by Sadie Sins and previously published 2016. Apprentice Saga is the second saga in the mm erotic world of Demon Bonded. This serial is a fun play on monster collecting and male harems. Expect demon bonding, master/slave relationships of mild and abusive nature, multiple partners, magical powers, learning how to be a sorcerer, and conflict with crueler demon masters.

XX 68,000+ wrds, serial, paranormal, humanoid demons, sorcerers, and bondage. Published: February 4, 2017

Drunk, Blind, Stupid Cupid
Wounded Hearts: Book One

Aiden didn’t expect to spend Valentine’s Day doing anything but cursing the color scheme. He’s built a wall around his heart filled with bitterness and cynicism created by years of disappointment and neglect. A wall two winged boys are determined to ignore as they claim that Aiden is their destiny.
X 33,000+ wrds, paranormal, angels, threesome, NA. Published: February 12, 2016

My Broken Angel
Wounded Hearts: Book Two

I didn’t know that one bloody kiss could change my life forever. I‘ve found my soulmate and nothing makes sense anymore. He’s a half demon, half angel who just got out of the pit. Danyal doesn’t know how to be human—Worse, he doesn’t know how to keep living. There’s nothing I won’t do for him but I’m only human and when Danyal runs, he flies.
X 50,000+ wrds, paranormal, angels, demons, NA. Published: March 4, 2017

Home Invasion
Obsession: Book 1

When an intruder breaks into their house with a gun, Joshua, and his father Kyle are forced into a series of depraved acts by a deranged man that demands submission. Kyle will do anything to protect his son, but he can’t help but notice that Joshy seems more than eager to do everything the armed thief tells him, just as long as his father is involved.
XXX 25,000+ wrds, contemporary, forced to fuck, father/son, incest, straight to gay. Published: January 15, 2017

Taken By Beasts
A M/M Erotic Halloween Collection

This collection contains five never before released, steamy paranormal stories of monsters and the innocent, handsome young men they call prey *cough* boyfriend.
X-XXX 66,000+ wrds, monsters, Hallowen, werewolves, sorcery, dubcon, NA. Published: October 28, 2016

The Autumn Prince

Eaves has spent a lifetime hiding from the elves that would kill him. After one dangerous night and an angry eyed prince, Eaves must decide if his future lies with humans or the elf he’s fallen for.
X 36,000+ wrds, Fantasy, elves, action adventure, dubcon, NA. Published: September 9, 2016

StepDaddy

Jeff has been doing everything he can to keep his distance from his hunky new stepson. But when Ethan starts dressing provocatively to get the man’s attention, there’s only one way to handle the situation. Like a daddy.
X 35,000+ wrds, contemporary, straight to gay, first time, pseudo incest, NA. Published: August 27, 2016

Robyn: Forced To Be Their Sister
A MMMM Incest Dubcon Erotica

Rob is pissed that his brothers have once again humiliated him, calling him a chick in front of the team. He’s sick of being treated like a girl. The only problem is, he keeps acting like one, his three older brothers done dealing with the little brat’s hissy fits. They’re going to teach their sis a lesson Rob won’t forget.
XX 17,000+ wrds, contemporary, brothercest, dubcon, and angst. Published: June 11, 2016

HEAT: Abducted To Be His Mate
A Mate Of His Own: Book 1

If having to go through his first heat wasn’t bad enough for werewolf Ryan Moss, kidnapping and tying up his rival of forever, Shane Cooper, guarantees to make it eventful. Too bad Ryan’s wolf thinks the boy is perfect for mating no matter how straight Shane says he is.
XXX 23,000+ wrds, paranormal, werewolf, straight to gay, noncon, bdsm. Published: June 3, 2016

BITE: Claiming His Mate
A Mate Of His Own: Book 2

Shane thought facing Ryan after their day of confusing, overwhelming pleasure was going to be difficult. It’s nothing compared to having to face his family and himself. If he fails, his inner spirit wolf could kill Ryan and everyone he knows.
XX 23,000+ wrds, paranormal, werewolf, straight to gay, dubcon, bdsm. Published: July 1, 2016

Bullying Teacher
Bullying Teacher: The Complete Serial

This book contains all five episodes of Bullying Teacher previously published by Sadie Sins and bonus material never before read, totaling in over 60,000 words of content. What starts as a bizarre protection scam quickly spirals into something else as Darien awakens dark, confusing desires in his once innocent, straight teacher. Can Beau find a way to free himself from the strange obsession taking him, or will he be bullied into something that could lose him his job and life as he knows it?
XXX 60,000 wrds, student/teacher, new adult, bdsm. Published: May 27, 2016

The Drunk Email
A Brothercest Erotica

Nick has had a crush on his older brother for as long as he could remember. Justin is just so perfect; handsome, strong with blond hair and blue eyes. It’s impossible to look anywhere else. Nick never thought he’d ever tell his brother how he felt. That was until Justin went on a school trip out of country and Nick got lonely and really drunk.
X 12,000+ wrds, contemporary, brothercest, dubcon, and angst. Published: May 1, 2016

I’ll Tell
A Blackmailing Stepbrother Romance

Jayce has been doing everything to get his now official younger brother settled in to his new home, all while fighting some very unbrotherly feelings for the angry, isolated brat. After things get weird, Declan decides to turn the tables, blackmailing his older brother into greater heights of depravity. Can Jayce keep from getting sucked into Declan’s twisted games?
XX 56,000+ wrds, contemporary, stepbrother psi, new adult, blackmail. Published: January 23, 2016

Dare

Brendon wasn’t looking to be molested by his best friend’s asshole of a friend, Mitch, forced to suck the kid’s fingers for a dare. Worse, suddenly Jake finally admits his very gay feelings for his very pretty friend, seemingly oblivious to the fact that Brendon is straight. But Jake thinks his best friend is just repressed and he’s willing to recruit some help to prove it.
XX 23,000+ wrds, contemporary, first time, dubcon, multi, NA. Published: January 2, 2016

Blackthorne
Dragon Shield: Book 1

Daniel Cross fell in love with the wrong sorcerer. Mason Blackthorne holds a conduit dragon inside, making him the target of every evil warlock that could conceive to capture him. Daniel has plenty of good reasons for avoiding Mason but his heart and body are completely at the conduit’s mercy. Can Daniel be convinced to fight for Mason or will he lose the only boy he’s ever truly loved to an ancient evil lurking in human flesh?
X 105,000+ wrds, paranormal, humanoid shifters, action adventure, and courting sorcerers. Published: December 19, 2015

Coffee Guy
Broken By Alphas

Galvin Starling, alpha werewolf and billionaire, runs a unique office. Jayden, the new coffee guy, has just found himself tied up in the same room as six large, strong alphas. He knows what’s coming next, he just isn’t sure he can handle it in such large numbers.
XXX 15,000+ wrds, paranormal, alpha wolf shifters, bondage, and office. Published: November 10, 2015

Doing Wrong
A Magical Romance

Chase wants someone he’s not supposed to have. Tristan Bryant is sexy, talented and infuriating, not to mention already seeing someone. Chase crosses the line when he uses a spell to disguise himself as Tristan’s boyfriend, all while falling for the brat. He doesn’t know how to make things right and Tristan seems determined to hate him forever.
XX 33,000+ wrds, paranormal, dubcon, sorcerers, and school. Published: November 7, 2015

The Demon Virus
A Magical Romance

This is a rather intense, dripping wet, XX-XXX rated fic featuring a naïve main character, his manipulative best friend, a very sexually aggressive incubus that finds his victims through the Internet, and his big monster cock covered in ridges. Like the majority of my stories, it features dubcon and is intended for 18+ readers.
XXX 10,000+ wrds, paranormal, dubcon, noncon, and demon. Published: 2016

FOX CLAIMS VINCE

contains bestiality

Vincent’s obsession with Fox’s fur might lead him into more trouble than anticipated.

CHASING RAIDER

*wip*

Raider is determined to find a way to get a certain golden sorcerer to fall in love with him. Instead, Chris breaks his sex scent.

OBSESSION : STALKED

CONTEMPORARY MM EROTICA FEATURING INCEST

SHIFTER SAFE HAVEN

PARANORMAL MM ROMANCE

MY SECRET BRONICORN

PARANORMAL MM EROTIC SERIAL

A GLITTERING HERD OF UNICORN SHIFTERS ENDS UP ON EARTH WHERE THEY STRUGGLE WITH THE RESTRICTIVE SEXUAL CUSTOM OF MONOGAMY

CITY HOWLS

PARANORMAL MM EROTIC SERIAL

SAGE WAKES WITH AN OVERWHELMING SEX SCENT AND MUST RUN FROM GANGS OF WEREWOLVES

TEDDY'S NAUGHTY ADVENTURES

CONTEMPORARY MM EROTIC SERIAL

TEDDY, A BEAUTIFUL ORPHAN, STUMBLES INTO A PROSTITUTION RING IN THE SUBURBS

SPEED WRITING FORMULAIC MM EROTICA

This is a writing experiment focused on short, 10,000 words, stand alone erotica. All high heat dubcon/noncon, bestiality, shota, or incest type fics–all the fun stuff. Dark, sexy shorts with the twist of I plan to write them on the weekends. Rough, quick fics made for fun, not complex story lines. Many won’t even have a title but I’ll be sure to give a quick summary of kinks to keep the faint of heart from, well, being shocked by inert words on a screen. XD

These fics will eventually be published, but my focus atm is to get them written without the obsessive perfectionist required with my novel writing. This is about the writing flow, which is why I’m using it for formulaic writing instead of the more complex twists and turns of the novels.

Expect Outline/Summary placeholders until each story is written

#1

dubcon, feminization, straight to gay, cheating

#2

dubcon/noncon, bestiality, incest, humiliation

#3

Dubcon, Enemies to lovers, Straight to gay, Holiday themed-Christmas/New Years

#4

Incest, noncon, enslaved by sorcerer father and brother

#5

Shota, vampire, dubcon, first time

#6

to be announced

M/F BY NATALIE THORNS (AKA SADIE SINS)

Yeah, I write some straight stuff when I feel the urge. Dubcon, noncon and beast galore.

Bred By The Pack
Taken By Werewolves: Book 1

Laci Gayl’s weekend turns from an annoying camping trip with old friends to a confusing nightmare full of howling wolves and one very dead deer. If the monster-size wolves weren’t frightening enough, Laci feels inexplicably drawn to Justin no matter how crazy he is by calling himself a werewolf. With a dwindling population, Justin wants to breed Laci to his wolves so that she’ll bear their pups.

XXX 20,000+ wrds, dubcon/noncon, bestiality, paranormal, werewolves and multi. Published: August 8, 2016

Bitten
Dominated By His Inner Beast

Alexa never thought her best friend would obsessively try to mate with her after just one bite… To get over his latest breakup, Seth takes his best friend Alexa on the weekend trip, but fun turns deadly when Seth is bitten out in the woods. In minutes he’s feverish, confused, and showing signs of being taken over by his baser instincts. Things turn wild when he ties her up in the middle of the night. Alexa might have enough power to escape her brutish friend, she’s just not sure if she wants to once he gets his hands on her.

XXX 20,000+ wrds, dubcon/noncon, paranormal, alpha, sorcerers, and bondage. Published: September 2, 2016

Newest Releases

NEWEST RELEASES

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JUST IN CASE YOU MISSED THE LATEST BOOK, FIND IT HERE FIRST!

StepDaddy

StepDaddy

Ethan never expected to fall for his mother’s new love interest. He had never thought he’d ever look at a man that way at all. There’s just something about his caring but controlling stepfather that has everything upside down for the eighteen year old, his crush only getting worse the longer they share space.

Jeff has been doing everything he can to avoid his new stepson. Ethan is sweet, lonely, and absolutely beautiful. And worse, Jeff can’t help but want to protect the boy, especially when Ethan insists on dressing in provocative, hot ways. His stepson might just be trying to bait him, but for what he’s not sure.

When the two finally realize their attraction is mutual, Jeff knows he must leave to keep from crossing the line. Heartbroken, Ethan comes up with a plan. He’s just not sure it will be enough to convince his stepdaddy to stay.

18+ This novella contains explicit m/m sexual content, graphic language, and themes of bondage and discipline between adult men. Over 35,000 words long.

35,000+ wrds, Published August 27, 2016.
Heat level: X

3.99


WHAT READERS ARE SAYING ABOUT STEPDADDY

This was a hot, sexy, funny yet dirty read. Ethan can’t help checking out his hot stepdad and his stepdad Jeff has been lusting after his stepson for ages. Whose going to cave into their lust first?
Ethan made me laugh when he dressed to impress, with a provocative flare, to get Jeff’s attention.

The book is written well but I wouldn’t expect any less from Sadie Sins.

This was a fun and naughty read, and also a very provocative guilty pleasure. Jeff is the sexy, hot step, dad who is trying his hardest not to give into the raging lust that he has for his step son, Ethan. Ethan feels the same way and tries many little schemes to get Jeff’s attention. The only thing that bothered me about Jeff was his constant regret when he did give in to him at times, although I don’t want to spoil anything since it was an enjoyable read. Ethan’s mother is never there and they have somewhat of an open marriage, so there’s that. 🙂 The writing, of course, was excellent (as usual) and the characters were very tantalizing. I can’t wait to read about what happens in that home next. Super titillating.

Arghh, good, so good! This was kinda tame for Sadie, with the stepfather spending most of the book being a dang upstanding and respectable man *grumbles* I really wish this book had been longer, if for no other reason than to have lots more steamy Daddy kink scenes :p I loved both characters a lot! (cont…)

READ AN EXCERPT FROM CHAPTER ONE

“Damn, kid, don’t you ever go to school?”

Ethan blinked up from his phone screen as his stepfather came into the kitchen, his eyes lingering for a moment on the man’s tattooed arms. “Summer vaca,” Ethan mumbled, ducking his head back down and hiding behind his box of cereal as the man made his way to the stove top and began cooking up a late breakfast. “Don’t you have work?” He asked, not really expecting an answer. Jeff didn’t talk much. The guy had moved in six months ago after a whirlwind engagement and besides hanging out in the adjoining garage painting all day, Ethan rarely saw the man outside of the occasional times Jeff would try and catch up with him.

He was kind of glad the guy was so busy. Jeff unsettled the fuck out of him.

“I’ve actually been up since dawn. Just grabbing something to eat before I get back to the canvas. Got that gallery showing in a week and I need to get some last minute touchups done before framing.”

Ethan nodded to himself, having a bite of his now soggy cereal while sneaking a peek at the man. Jeff was still in his pajamas, wearing a pair of black flannel night pants and a black wifebeater that was flecked with spots of paint. He wasn’t wearing shoes—the man rarely did while around the house. Both of his arms were covered from shoulder to wrist in tattoo’s, his tanned skin colored in elaborate, geometric patterns in blue, gold, and black ink. It was apparently inspired by one of Jeff’s own paintings. A badass painting if he was to go by the man’s bulging biceps.

Ethan’s new stepfather was a lot of eye candy. With his piercing blue eyes and brown, shoulder-length wavy hair, the guy could have been a model. He had the body for it—tall, lean, and buff—as well as the not giving a fuck attitude. Jeff always looked like he was two days late to shave, a light fuzz prickling at his jaw and neck, and he rarely dressed up beyond jeans and a t-shirt. He was also one of those health nuts, having filled their refrigerator with tons of fresh, organic produce when he moved in, his blender heard before any of the alarm clocks went off.

“You looking for a job?”

Ethan ducked his head back down, shaking it silently when the man glanced over at him from the stove. He tried to lose himself in his video game but couldn’t stop from being distracted by Jeff’s presence across the room. The thing was, Ethan didn’t like guys. He was pretty fucking sure. But it was really hard to look away from Jeff whenever the man was around. There was just something about the guy that drew his eye and kept him looking. Like his colorful biceps. Or the way the man’s thin pants clung to his sculpted ass.

It was unsettling. Confusing. Ethan just couldn’t stop getting hot whenever around his stepfather and it had been going on for months now.

“You need a job, kid. An internship. Something. You going to waste your life hanging around the fucking house all the time?”

Ethan looked up when his cereal box was suddenly taken away, watching as Jeff placed a plate with an omelet in front of him, the man nudging his bowl of cereal aside on the kitchen island to make room. “You also need to start eating some actual food. There is no way there are enough calories in that sugary shit to even get you out of your chair. I don’t know how the hell you get through your soccer games on this shit.”

Jeff was damn near intimidating when up close, the man’s face predatorial and eyes stunning as they met his. He was also bisexual, something Ethan’s mom had mentioned in passing and now he couldn’t stop thinking about. Ethan nearly dropped his phone, quickly grabbing the fork that was pushed his way to hide his tremor.

“Your mother ever teach you how to cook?” Jeff asked, cocking his hip and leaning against the island while he waited for Ethan to try the food. The hem of the man’s shirt was stretched over his hips in a way that revealed a flash of tanned abs and a sparse trail of hair leading beneath his pants. It was very distracting.

Ethan really wished the guy would look somewhere else so he could fucking breathe and stop feeling like an idiot already. He shook his head silently, finally giving in to his stepfather and scooping some food onto his fork. “Shit—I mean, this is really good. Uh, sir. T-Thank you.”

Jeff raised a brow at the stuttering boy, silently mouthing the word ‘sir’ to himself. His gaze slid down to where the blond had just nearly dropped his fork. “Well?”

Ethan jolted, looking up, the utensil now caught between his lips. “Um…?”

“Did Leah ever show you how to cook?” Jeff repeated, a slight smile curling the edges of his lips when Ethan began to flush.

“My mom’s not… She doesn’t cook,” Ethan mumbled, reaching for his phone with his other hand in the hopes of ending this absolutely alarming conversation where his stepfather looked at him and kept asking him about stuff.

“You wanna learn how?” Jeff prompted, watching as the blond boy tried to hide behind the small cell phone screen and eat another bite of food at the same time. “Seeing as you’re going to be around all day, and I do try to make it a point to eat.”

Ethan shrugged, grunting something noncommittal.

Jeff was not deterred, the man’s fingers curling around the boy’s wrist to guide his hand away from his face. When Ethan looked up, only blushing brighter now, he added, “And while I’m showing you how to cook, you can fill out some job applications.”

The man’s words sinking in, Ethan scowled, pulling his hand away to rest it on the table instead. His wrist felt like it was tingling where Jeff had touched it, an annoying distraction as he tried to state his case for not needing any job now that he had gotten his last year of high school out of the way.

“I don’t want a job. I’m starting college in a couple of months and I just want to chill for a bit before all that.”

“What, are you ancient? Decrepit? Eat your omelet.” Jeff turned away, going back to the stove and cracking more eggs into a bowl and whisking them with a fork. “You’re going to want money, right? You’re going to want to hang out with your friends. Gas cost money, kid. Concerts, food, the mall—Believe me, you’re going to want a job.”

“Really, I’m not,” Ethan muttered, glaring at his plate. He had only just started to feel the freedom of being out of school. All he wanted to do was hang out with his friends and maybe his house. “My mom will pay for all that shit.”

Jeff snorted, the trash bin rattling as he threw the eggshells into the wastebasket. “Like fuck, she will. Leah does enough without needing to pay for your lazy ass.”

“I’m not lazy,” Ethan said with a growl.

“Oh, did you pay for that $600 phone your face is always glued to? What about the nearly $100 a month it costs so that you can text your friends your every riveting thought as you have them? The motorcycle you’re driving or the insurance that allows you to do so?” Jeff turned, pointing the spatula at him when Ethan stood, the boy getting ready to escape. “What about rent? All that cardboard food you keep eating? Just where do you think the money for all that comes from? Not your schooling.”

Pursing his lips, Ethan crossed his arms over his chest. “I’m not lazy. I’m just a kid.”

Jeff scoffed. “Not anymore, you aren’t. I don’t get why Leah didn’t have you working through summers. It’s time to grow the fuck up and start contributing. I’m not painting every day to keep your ass in designer jeans, kid.”

Glaring, a million scathing retorts swirling in his head, Ethan opened his mouth but nothing came out. Jeff’s eyes were blazing, the man unblinking and deceptively calm as he just stared him down. “No one asked you to buy me anything,” Ethan finally muttered, unable to meet the man’s glare any longer. He liked it, though. A part of him liked that Jeff cared enough to lend him money for things. His mother was never around but Jeff was, even if the guy didn’t talk to him as much as he’d like. Ethan had never had a dad before and Jeff was the closest thing to perfect in a lot of ways when it came to things like that.

“Hm.” His eyes narrowed, Jeff turned back to the stove, flipping his omelet before it started browning. “Don’t go running off until you eat. I don’t think you’ve had more than pizza and Cheetos this entire week.”

Sighing in exasperation, Ethan sat, glaring at the man’s back. Only to have his eyes inadvertently slide down, his gaze caught on Jeff’s ass when the man leaned over to grab the salt and pepper shakers. It was a decidedly interesting ass; firm, symmetrical and muscular. He hadn’t really known that he liked muscular asses but he definitely liked Jeff’s.

“You interested in anything in particular?”

Ethan jumped, his eyes snapping up. But the brunette was only looking at the pan, poking it with his spatula. “What?”

“For work. You have anything in mind you’d like to do?”

Ugh. “Play video games,” Ethan said flippantly.

“Cute. I’m sure people just hand you money for that shit.”

“Coming from the artist,” he muttered, stabbing at his omelet. That it was about the best thing he had tasted in as long as he could remember didn’t help his mood at all. “People pay you to hang out around the house painting pictures.”

“Not exactly.” Plating his food, Jeff turned the stove top off and poured himself a glass of fresh juice before sitting across from Ethan at the kitchen island.

“People buy a product from me. Now some pay for a service if they want to hire me to paint as a demonstration, or to design a mural, tattoo, whatever. But for the most part, I create something and people buy a print or the original. That’s how I can get away with hanging around the house all day; I’m selling even when I’m asleep. That doesn’t mean I don’t have to work it for clients at galleries and meetings that get my art on walls where people can see. Renting out one of my paintings to a business requires me to do more than just paint, but it’s worth the money that comes in. Half my income this month was just on rented paintings. They’re not even new pieces but they can pay the bills if you know what you’re doing.”

Ethan really didn’t want to care just how Jeff made his money. Unfortunately, he was finding it interesting and he sighed again, daring to look up at the man. Jeff’s head was ducked, a long lock of wavy hair brushing over one of his eyes, his mouth open as he took a bite of his breakfast. The man had ridiculously lush lips, full and red. Combined with his sharp features and strong jaw, he really was just the epitome of male beauty. Ethan idly wondered what it would be like to kiss those lips. They probably weren’t as soft as they looked. With Jeff’s bristle, it might even be prickly, a little rough.

Glancing up, Jeff caught Ethan staring at him, the boy immediately looking away. “You pick a major yet?”

Ethan shook his head weakly, hating how flustered he felt. “Mom said she was going to help.”

“Yeah, well waiting for Leah to pull herself from her work is like watching paint dry.” Jeff smiled grimly. “I can help you if you want. I’m surprisingly good at that kind of shit.”

Glancing his way a moment, Ethan shrugged. “Okay. Um, maybe tonight? Once I get back from hanging with my friends. I was thinking of something business oriented.”

He couldn’t help but wonder how quickly it had taken for Jeff to figure out just how unavailable his mother really was. It would probably still take the man a good year to realize she wasn’t going to change. And seeing as he married her, he might even stick it out longer trying to make it work. He was young still; he might think it was worth putting the effort in.

Ethan hoped he would. Not because he wanted to see Jeff break his heart but because he really liked having the man as a stepfather. Jeff was cool. Scary, but cool. Ethan had never had anyone actually care about him and even though Jeff breezed in and out most of the day between painting, the man was always saying and doing stuff that made it clear he gave a fuck. He was a calming presence. Sturdy and reliable. Ethan wasn’t used to having something like that and he’d be really pissed if his mother ruined it for him.

His mother had tried this time, he knew that much. Jeff was very different from what Leah usually dated. He was self-driven and had interests outside of just their relationship—Really important seeing as Ethan’s mother lived for her work and her last three relationships had failed because she couldn’t put enough time or energy into them. She was always at the office and when she was home, her head was at the office, planning new ideas, designing new rooms and buildings.

Leah Walde was an architect, a highly sought after one, and she had started her own firm ten years ago. Jeff had actually been commissioned to create a portrait of one of her more famous buildings and that was how they had met. That Jeff could balance his creativity with business savvy had been a good fit for Leah, even if Jeff didn’t have much interest in doing much beyond supporting himself so that he could continue his painting. It was still a step up from the last guy who had thought he was going to be some sort of jobless house husband.

“Any thoughts on what you want to learn how to cook for tonight?” Jeff asked, having a sip of his juice.

Ethan couldn’t help but stare; a droplet of moisture dripping from his stepfather’s mouth to trickle down his chin. God, what was wrong with him? He blinked, finding Jeff staring at him with a raised brow, the man waiting patiently for an answer. Ethan really didn’t have one. “Um, whatever you feel like eating, I guess.”

Grinning wickedly, Jeff put his glass down, leaning close and crooking his finger. “Careful there. I don’t think you could stomach half the things I eat, kid.”

His breath curling hot around his ear, Ethan’s breath hitched. He glanced Jeff’s way, feeling stupid as fuck when he caught the man still smiling. His eyes were sparkling at him, flashing with some hidden laughter that was making him feel hot inside. For a frozen eternity, he was certain the man was flirting with him and he had no idea how to respond.

Thankfully, Jeff seemed oblivious to his panic, the man reaching over and patting Ethan’s shoulder reassuringly. “Don’t worry, kid, I won’t make you eat anything too healthy and green. Seeing the diet you’re coming from, I wouldn’t want to overwhelm your system with anything of substance.”

“Oh.” Gnawing on his bottom lip, Ethan slowly sank back in his seat, hoping his cheeks would stop burning soon. He had a sip of his soda, his gaze inadvertently drawn to his stepfather again. “Um… So, like, when did you know you were bi?” Ethan asked daringly, his heart feeling trapped in his throat once he got the question out.

Moving in a way that seemed just a little too casual, Jeff placed his fork down. “Young. Younger than you are.” He met Ethan’s curious gaze, his head tilting slightly. “Why? Does my sexuality make you uncomfortable?”

“Jesus, only when you say it like that,” Ethan muttered, covering his face with his hand for a moment. He peeked out, combing his fingers through his short blond locks. “Just… Did you know at the same time? Or was it, like, you liked one and then realized you liked the other later?”

Considering the question a moment, Jeff finally answered after having another drink of his juice. “Both. I had at least half a dozen crushes back then and it was pretty easy for me to see that gender was not a barrier for my attraction.”

“So bi people, they all know, like, at the same time, then? Like, if you’re going to be bi, you’re definitely going to know when you start getting crushes. It doesn’t, like, change?” Ethan asked nervously, his fingers twisting at his placemat.

“I’m not sure that would be the way I’d word it,” Jeff said carefully, studying his stepson’s face while Ethan bit his lip and looked at the table. “I think attraction is based on more than just a body, and sometimes when all the right elements come together, you might just find yourself looking at someone you weren’t expecting to be looking at.”

His brows furrowing at the answer, Ethan forced himself to look the man in the eye. “I’m not talking about love or shit. I’m not saying people can’t, like, fall in love and overcome gender or what have you. I just want to know if, you know, you can suddenly be attracted to…” He trailed off, waving his hand nervously.

“Are you worried you’re going to wake up wanting to suck cock?” Jeff asked blandly.

“Now you’re just being an asshole.” Scowling and beyond embarrassed, Ethan stood, more than ready to get away from this man that flustered the fuck out of him on so many different levels. “I don’t think there is anything wrong with gay people. That’s not what I was—”

“Sit your ass down, brat,” Jeff ordered quietly. “Did I say there was anything actually wrong with sucking cock?”

Ethan paused and glared at the man, his brain unfortunately now stuck on the question of if his stepfather had ever sucked cock and what that might look like. A beat later and he sat back down, his leg bouncing nervously. “I just want to know if you can, well… Like a…” He couldn’t say it and was only feeling more upset by the fact because it was Jeff he was trying to explain it to.

“Can you suddenly like someone of the same gender and still like the opposite sex as well?” Jeff supplied when Ethan seemed unable to continue on.

Pursing his lips, Ethan nodded sharply. “But more, can you just, like, suddenly like someone of the same gender. When you never did before. Not ever.”

“Not ever?” Jeff repeated, his eyebrows rising in disbelief.

“Not ever,” Ethan repeated sternly, daring him to call him a liar.

“Well, I’ve only ever had my own experiences to compare to, but if this has happened to someone, I’m pretty sure it’s not the end of the world.” He flashed the boy a comforting smile, placing his elbow on the table so he could lean his chin on his hand. “It’s not like this person would have to act on anything just because he felt something new. People get crushes all the time and don’t act on them.”

Ethan nodded, fairly certain Jeff had no idea just who he was crushing on by the casual air the man was giving off. “But it’s, like, normal?”

“As normal as the huge range of human sexuality can get.”

“But is it bi?” Ethan added, his expression again growing tense.

“It’s whatever that person wants it to be. A fluke. A one-time attraction… Or maybe it’s bi, and they’re just finding out.” Jeff’s smile had only grown, his eyes sparkling, and Ethan was feeling decidedly uncomfortable with just how nice the man looked with his perfectly white teeth.

“Stop smiling at me like that. I never said it was me,” he grumbled, grabbing his plate and jumping up to rinse it in the sink.

“Did I say I thought it was you?” Jeff asked, his smile now beaming. “Shit, are you going to start calling me dad now?”

“Fuck off,” Ethan snapped, grinning despite himself. “You’re lucky I call you sir.”

“Yeah, could you not do that? It’s weird—Children of the Corn weird. That would be a movie you’ve never heard of, by the way.” Jeff stood as well, stepping up behind Ethan at the sink with his empty plate in hand. “Just call me Jeff. ‘Hey you,’ if you’re feeling lazy.”

Ethan was having trouble focusing, Jeff standing far too close for him to notice anything else. God, it might be ‘normal’ but it was still really annoying to feel so fucking hot over someone. “Here, just…” He turned, taking the plate and fork from the man, nearly dropping both when their fingers brushed accidentally. Spinning back, he quickly washed them and put them in the dryer rack, his heart racing too fast in his chest. God, he hated this. Fucking hated it.

Jeff had stepped around the island and was drinking the last of his juice when Ethan finally got up the nerve to turn around. The faucet off, he crossed the kitchen to grab his phone.

“I start cooking around 6:30,” Jeff said, Ethan pausing mid-stride.

“Right. Um, I’m going to meet my friends tonight. Like, eightish.”

“Alright. It’s a plan.”

Nodding, Ethan edged to the door, slipping through with a quick backward glance. Jeff was staring back at him and for a frozen moment their eyes met, Ethan’s heart racing in response.

God, he really needed to get over this thing.

***

Son of a bitch. Bi? Was the kid bi now? Why did Ethan have to tell him he thought he might be bi? What was he trying to do to him?

Groaning inwardly, Jeff pressed both his hands on the kitchen island, leaning heavily over the countertop as he willed his erection down. One fumbling touch from the kid’s hand on his and he had gotten hard. Not good. Really not good.

Talking to Ethan had been a terrible, terrible idea. Sure, he had known he was being too antisocial and that he was worried the kid would start thinking he hated him. Leah hadn’t been around in forever, and he was pretty sure the kid had no adult supervision in his life but fuck… Fuck.

The things he would do to Ethan Walde if he hadn’t married the boy’s mother.

He was too young for him, didn’t know shit about life—And only ten minutes ago, decidedly straight. Many very good reasons Jeff had focused on whenever he found himself in the same room as the young man. But Ethan was also fucking delicious. He had soft, golden hair and wide, clear, green eyes, flawless skin and his average height was already filled out with muscle from his competitive soccer playing. That summer vacation had started and Ethan seemed content to haunt the kitchen and living room most hours of the day, half the time without a shirt on, had become a special type of hell for Jeff.

Cooking lessons? The kid needed to learn how to cook—to eat—but shit, why the fuck had he suggested cooking lessons? Knives and fire and the two of them in the somewhat cramped kitchen? Alone.

Dumb. Really fucking dumb.

He needed to get laid. That was all. He had gone into this thing with Leah with a predefined understanding that he needed sex more than she did and that she was more than happy to let him go out and get it as long as he was safe about it and he was home for the weekends to do family stuff. Of course, it had turned out that he had no problem being home on the weekends while Leah couldn’t seem to find her own house. Jeff hadn’t gotten around to checking out his options in the area. He had moved to a new town for Leah and although he was enjoying his large art studio, he hadn’t done much outside of the house besides grocery shop and jog in the morning. Something that was going to have to change if his sexy-ass stepson was hanging around all summer. And now bi.

The kid needed a job. Like yesterday.

Jeff could only hope that whatever reason Ethan had been looking at him strangely the last few weeks had to do with that conversation and would finally stop. The staring had been the icing on the shit cake of this insane situation. Ethan was probably just curious about the bi thing. More than a few guys were curious about the bi thing. It used to be the quickest way for Jeff to get a straight guy into bed—Just tell him he was bi and let him ask a million questions until he explained how much easier it was just to show than tell.

Not something he could do with Ethan. Not something he should even be fucking thinking about doing with the kid. Stepson. Young, naive, and very much off-limits for anything.

Hot, though. Really fucking hot. He had great nipples, the perfect size, pink spots just begging to be kissed, licked and then nipped sore. And his neck—he wanted to coat the boy’s long throat with his cum until it dripped down his toned torso like a pearly, dirty river. And if Ethan wanted to call him daddy while he was doing it, well, that would be more than fine with him.

“Jesus, get it the fuck together,” Jeff grunted to himself, his body lighting up with heat and his cock again hardening until it was pressed up against the side of the island.

It was time to start checking out his fucking options in the area. There was a bar within walking distance; some pool joint where he’d seen a mix of ages and sexes go in. He just needed to fuck something—preferably a hot twink that could pass for half his age so he could get this out of his system. Until then, he was going to have to settle for his hand and get the fuck back to work. He had a set of three paintings that Leah had commissioned from him for one of her older clients. It was guaranteed money and a potentially lasting connection if he got it all done in time and kissed ass well enough. That on top of his gallery opening in a week had him completely swamped. He couldn’t be wasting his time fantasizing about fucking his sexy-ass stepson.

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